Embrace Your Almost

Fun Notes about "Embrace Your Most."

• This book is about finding clarity and contentment---even in the middle of those almost-but-not-quite achieved dreams.
• Do you like your life? Do you like the life you're curating each day? Do you feel connected with whatever it is you're doing?
• Redefine Success
• We can be successful and create beautiful lives even when a specific goal or dream takes longer to achieve or doesn't work out exactly how we planned.
• Your biggest setback can become setups for success in the things that matter most to you. Sucess is possible- even if it looks different from what you initially envisioned.
• Success isn't One-size-fits-all
• Accolades: award, honor, or instance of positive acknowledgement or praise.
• Instead, real success is found in stewarding what matters most and ultimately becoming who we were made to be. 
• Are you ambitious?
• When you hear the word ambition, what do you think? We could go with the official definition: A strong desire to do or to achieve something, typically requiring determination and hard work.
• I don't think the type or amount of ambition a woman has should be measure of her value or success, nor do I think ambition is something she should be ashamed of having. 
• I believe ambition is a gift that GOD hardwire into our DNA.
• Susceptible: likely or liable to be influence or harm by a particular thing or easily influenced by feeling or emotions; sensitive. 
• At its core, ambition is really about determination.
• Derailed: to cause to run off the rail; its wheel accidentally leaves the tracks.
• Gluing Arbitrary Goals: refers to setting goals that lack specifically or measurability
• Arbitrary: based on random choice or personal whim, rather than any reason or system
• Even if they are the right goals, when we fail to achieve them, our disappointment can shake us to the core make us question or direction.
• When our reality stubbornly refuses to match the expectations, what do we do with our ambition?
• Trudged: walk slowly and with heavy steps, typically because of exhaustion or harsh condition.
• It was a project that needed patience and attention 
• Endeavor: try hard to do or achieve something.
• We pause, fix our focus on what we're aiming for, remember why we've aiming for it, and either change directions if necessary or deep and find the courage to keep going- perhaps with a few adjustments in our approach the next time around.
• When you're faced with an almost-but-not-quite moments, dare to ask yourself these three questions: 

1. What do I truly want? In other words, what does success truly look like for you? What do you value in a world that says you should want it all?
2. Why do I want it? In other words, why are you pursuing it? This is what I consider the single most important question because it will ground you and help you stay focus on what matters most so that you can pursue the right goals for you. This is so much better than striving to do something just be much better than striving to do something just because you saw someone else do it or because you feel like you have something to prove. 
3. How am I going to steward it? In other words, how will you cultivate the life right in front of you- even if a certain milestone, goal, or outcome seems out of reach? 

These three questions are essential in the face of disappointment because those almost-but-not-quite moments are often the only time we slow down and reevaluate.

• And you can grow only where you are planted, not where you think you should be.
• Steward: Manage 
• Letting go of a Good Thing
• Have you ever had to decide to let go of a dream or some other good thing?
• Counter Productive: having the opposite of the desired effect.
• We ask ourselves, why mess with it? Even if deep down we know that what's working now might not be right for us long term.
• You may find yourself in a place where you have a difficult decision to make: will you hold on to what is comfortable or familiar, even if you know it's not right for you? Or will you let it go, even if doing so makes you feel as if you let yourself or others down?
• Compels: transitive verb that means to force or urge someone to do something.
• A Budding Entrepreneur: is someone who has recently started their entrepreneur journey, or often characterized by exploration experimental, and the developing of essential skills and network
• Catapulted: A device that can throw objects at high speed 
• But if pursued with reckless abandon, our endeavors can get us into trouble quick. When we become so focused on succeeding, padding our bank accounts out of fear that we might not have enough or seeking the approval of others it can lead to over commitment, overwhelm, and utter confusion.
• Making Difficult Decision
• Deviate: depart from an established course.
• But I was unclear about the answers to basic questions: What is the purpose of this company beyond just inspiring people? What clear problem do we provide a solution to? What is this message supposed to mean? How do we ensure that it's being consistently as possible? Where am I taking this?
• You know, those times when something you dreamed of actually begins to work but then takes over your Life? Or when you're running on fumes but lacking any sort of direction?
• If your internal experience doesn't match your external appearance, something is out of alignment somewhere.
• Until you get those two lined up, it won't matter how much money you make, how many people praise your work, or how awesome everything looks. you will always feel almost-but-not-quite satisfied.
• I pray for clarity, I pray for direction, and I pray for a step-by- step plan on how to improve what wasn't working for me. I prayed to get out of this almost-there-season.
• How to let Go of a Dream
• Tell me if this sound like you: you need to let go of something, but you continue to hold on, even if only by a string you wait for the perfect plan before taking a leap, you want certainty that you're making the right decision and that everything will work out once you do let go.
• You keep pushing forward on the same path because you feel guilty for giving up on a dream.
• I want to give you a few helpful steps to letting go of a dream so that, when necessary, you can release your grip and make room for God to do new things:

1. Identify what matters most and why; don't just settle for what works; aim for what lasts. When we're faced with the disappointment of a dream not living up to our expectations or the overwhelm that comes with trying to force something, the most important thing we can do is to step back and ask,"What matters most in this situation? What is most important to me? What do I truly value?"The first step to letting go of any good thing is identifying the things that aren't aligned with what matters most to you. Always start there.
2. Evaluate and seek counsel. I've found it's helpful to set a bit of a limit on this, either on the amount of time to make the decision (for example, ninety days) or on the number of conversations I'll have before taking action (for example, no more than five or ten). This helps me avoid annoying the heck out of everyone in my life or stalling on a step I know I need to take. Persevering: continuing in a course of action despite difficulty or delay in achieving success.
3. Make a plan for the open space on your plate. One of the hardest parts of letting go of a dream is the unknown on the other side of the decision. We ask ourselves questions like: What id breaking up ends up being a bad decision? What if I regret it or miss him? What will I do with the time that opens up when this person is no longer a focus in my life? 

• Analysis Paralysis: overthinking a problem to the point that it becomes more difficult to make a decision.
• The only thing that gave me peace (and the confidence to follow through!) was making an action plan for (1) how I would I go about seeing the decision through and (2) how I would move forward afterwards.
• As you face the decision to let go of a dream or another good thing, also make a plan to do one of those things you've always wanted to do: take up piano piano lessons, join a running club, or go back to school. This way, you'll have something to look forward to when you step away from the draining job, the unhealthy relationship, the would-be dream house that has turned into a money pit, or whatever it is that you know you need to release.
• Dream again
• When your expectation gets interrupted
• Everything is not Okay
• It is not a test
•  True success in anything boils down to how we love
• The true measure of our success is how well we love as we build 
• And that dares me to believe that a successful life is less about achieving our greatest dreams and more about how we love and keep loving—and keep fighting and keep dreaming—even when those dreams fall apart.
• The first step forward
• That experiment taught me that when I feel stuck, there is so much power in taking teeny, tiny steps forward. A little progress is better than no progress, and it’s always better to start small than to not start at all.
• Your One-Step-a-Day List
• Instead of going all in, all at once create a one-step-a-day list (or one-step-a-week list if you need move slower)
• Incremental, implementable, imperfect action “because massive action sounds massively overwhelming.”
• Too often we think that if we can’t do everything, we shouldn’t do anything.
• As you make your one-step-a-day list, think about what small things you can do to move forward, even if you can’t ju7st open a full-blown bakery right now, your list might look something like this:

DAY 1: Brainstorm, and put together one recipe (such as a pastry)

DAY 2: Bake a batch of the recipe

DAY 3:Give samples to family and friends, ask for feedback, and perfect the recipe

DAY 4: Research local cafe and coffee shops

DAY 5: Call those shops, and offer to supply pastries for their customers

DAY 6: For those that say yes, decide how many you’ll need to make each week.

DAY 7: Create a sticker or packing for your pastries so guests know they’re yours.

DAY 8: Develop a timeline and plan for testing your pastries in the local shops.

• Taking one-step-a-day is a necessary discipline to achieve our dreams, because success doesn’t come all at once. It comes one step at a time.
• Encumbrances: a burden or impediment
• Those bigger steps can come later, when you’re ready. In meantime, this will give you a start on what you’ve been wanting to do and help you evaluate (1) whether you even like doing it as a job and (2) whether you wish to invest more time, talent, and resources to pursue it more seriously.
• If it’s possible to pursue in this season but you’re unsure where to start, create a one-step-a-day list.
• Above all, when life hands you hardship or your dreams don’t go according to plan, revisit “why” you’re pursuing whatever it is that you are. Then give yourself permission to dream again and to keep going when you get stuck, even if you have to start small and move slow, one step at a time. 
• Always Almost There
• Plateaued/Plateau: an area of relatively level high ground.
• Scarcity: the state of being scarce or in short supply; shortage
• Ever feel like you’re always almost where you want to be? Or as though the second you reach a milestone, everyone around you has already moved past it and there’s another thing to achieve? As though you’re always playing keep-up or catch up and never quite content with where you are? 
• How much is Enough?
• Arbitrarily: on the basis of random choice or personal whim, rather than any reason or system. 
• Start with my aim in mind, get clear on the resources I truly needed, prepare accordingly, and then ensure that those resources were allocated properly. When something goes wrong or knock us down, I think there’s an internal switch that flips and causes us to focus on the essentials: What is the priority, and how much of a given resource ( time, money, etc.) do I need to pursue that?
• In a strange and beautiful way, the wounds from our deepest disappointments and devastating experiences can serve as defining moments that help us look past arbitrary pressure and define what enough looks like in our lives.
• Define “Enough” by asking “Why?”
• Accolades: an award or privilege granted as a special honor or as an acknowledgement of merit.
• Start with defining “Enough.” The discipline of defining “Enough” requires auditing each commitment, task, and goal that takes up space on our plates by asking, “Why? Why am I doing or pursuing this?”
• Overarching Purpose: form an arch over.
• When we’re not clear on what we actually need or don’t  have deeper meaning driving our goals, we may have a more difficult time sticking with them. 
• Your motivation can’t be the milestone or the goal itself. I must be the “why.” The purpose behind what you’re doing, for it to be sustainable and worthwhile. This makes the goal you’re aiming for less like a trophy to show off and more like a vehicle to help you achieve that purpose. After all, that satisfaction lasts only for a second before someone else has something even more impressive to show.
• Sabbatical: a period of paid leave granted to a University teacher or other workers for study or travel, traditionally one year for every seven years worked
• It’s important to regularly ask ourselves critical questions like, “why that number, goal, or level? And is that what I actually need to get to where I want to or need to go? Or does it just sounds sexy?”
• In order to define “enough” and pursue the right goals for ourselves, especially when life tosses us a curveball or knock us down, we have to ask the following questions:

1. What do I hope to achieve?
2. Why do I want to achieve that? Why am I doing what I’m doing?
3. How will I get there? What will I need to reach that goal?

• For the ones that are, define what what “Enough” looks like for you and make a plan to steward those things with excellence and focus.
• Instead, narrow your focus, refine your goals based on your needs, and then consider how you will pursue them from a place of purpose rather than out of the pressure to prove something to people who have their own lives to worry about.
• When Things Don’t Go According to Plan (Again)
• When One Plan After Another Falls Apart
• I often say that the most important lessons are the hardest to learn, and both delayed solidified that belief in me. Some lessons—the ones that rubs against the very way as we learn how to adapt and make the most of the circumstances we face.
• Experiences we not merely inconveniences but also invitations to trust God and grow in a way I might otherwise have missed, had I still been under the illusion that if I just planned enough or did enough, I  would maintain full control.
• Which of these projects and goals are truly necessary? Which are aligned with where I want to go, and which are not?
• When it comes to ur hopes, plans, ambitions, and dreams, the reality is that we have control over only a few key things: what we choose to focus on next, why we choose the things that we do, and how we respond when plans work out and when they don’t.
• Real losses and letdowns come with real implications.
• Why is this happening? What am I suppose to do now?
• So, if you’re a human, too, the best encouragement I can offer you is to give yourself the grace and space to acknowledge the fears, frustrations, and other feeling that come up when you’re faced with setbacks or disappointments. Then, once you freak out for a minute, take a deep breath and ask yourself, What’s the best next step I can take? How can I  make the most of this almost?
• And I can’t help but think that was a gift I never asked for but truly needed.
• Navigating the unpredictable
• But what I’ve learned is that even when things seem steady and secure, it’s wise not to fall under the illusion that we’re in full control.
• Are there choices within our control? Of course. Can we make our lives better or worst based on the choices we make? Most of the time.
• Plan in shorter increment.
• Increments: an increase or addition, especially one of a series on a fixed scale.
• Set a few goals, but as much as possible, plan the details for achieving them in shorter increments of time. You might find that you’re able to be more focused and intentional in that shorter window and less dependent on your expectations for the future. This approach nicely blends the wisdom of planning with the freedom and whimsy of taking life one day at a time.
• Focus on Doing Less but Better
• When our ambitions start to carry us away and we try to force something to work out when plans need to change—or we pursue a million dreams at once—we will fail to do anything well. The unpredictability that we face in life highlights the importance of focusing on very few things at a time and doing them well.
• For example, if you planned to improve your health, maybe you believe you had to go all in, all at once. In our all-or-nothing world, it can feel like you need to sign up for fitness classes, eat more vegetables, get on supplements, sleep eight hours a night, but cut out sugar, caffeine, and practically everything else. And now. That’s a lot of things. But if life happen and an unexpected disruption slows you down or makes doing all the things more difficult, you might feel discouraged. You might even be tempted to give up altogether.
• Instead of going all in, all at once, only to consider quitting when real life hits, consider quitting when real life hits, consider one or two changes you can focus on until they become second nature, or habits. Could you focus on fitness classes and reducing stress for the next ninety days? Then add in another change after a few months.
• If we leave a little space for unexpected change, plan in smaller increments, and remain focused on doing the most important things well, we might even be able to hit that curveball.
• Plan away, but keep your hands open to change, Because success isn’t just when things work out exactly how we planned; it’s also when we tend to do what’s right in front of us even when our plans don’t go according to plan.
• When a Dream Come True. Becomes a Nightmare.
• When The Dream Shatter Again
• Have you ever felt stuck in a loop—as if every time your dream almost come true, your greatest fears do instead?
• What do you do when life breaks your heart over and over again? When, instead of getting what you’ve prayed for? In a world that tells us to pull ourselves together and get on with life, we need to start with acknowledging the we are hurting, broken, and not okay.
• Story of my life
• Has something like that ever happen to you? Maybe you haven’t suffered tragic loss, but maybe you haven’t started on the road towards a milestone or desired destination, but then you were forced to turn around and start over at square one? How do we keep believing when the desired destination seems so far away?
• On the way to your greatest dreams, don’t count on a straight shot.
• Don’t Count on a Straight Shot
• Appendectomy: a surgical operation to remove the appendix.
• A route we can take, but it wasn’t the ultimate destination.
• It might not have worked out how we pictured, but that doesn’t mean God’s plan didn’t work out exactly how it was supposed to.
• Many of the most precious things until this point in my life haven’t come fast or easy. Most have been refined—or redefined—through the fire of rejections, restart's, and redirection.
• That doesn’t make it hurt any less when our journey is cut short, but I do believe it brings some solace to know that (1) we’re not the only one it happens to and (2) it’s not the end of the road.
• Solace: comfort or consolation in a time of distress or sadness.
• What does this have to do with your life? Think about a recent U-Turn you’ve had to make or a detour you’ve had to take on the way towards your dreams—- the life you’re aiming for. What has that felt like? How have you responded? What has it taught you?
• Now look back at a dream that has come true in your life. Perhaps that dream was paying off student debt. If so, was getting where you wanted to be ( in this case, debt-free) and easy, straight shot without any disrupted plans or shattered dreams? Or did it take longer than you thought? Or did you pay the debt off quickly but had to make a lot of sacrifices in your social and personal life to make it happen? Did you run into any unexpected challenges or setbacks along the way? The journey to the life we long to create often takes longer than we’d like, doesn’t it?
• “Life is about the journey, not the destination.”
• Maybe the secret to contentment isn’t found when we get something we want easily and on the first try. Instead, maybe contentment grows in all the hard moments that break us down—even when we feel stuck in a nightmare loop—as we learn to persevere each day. 
• Faith Versus Logic
• When you feel betrayed, let down, or completely shattered, does it ever seem like faith and logic are at war within you? Like it’d be easier to just quit altogether? It’s so hard, isn’t it? It’s like everything in you wants to keep believing but everything around you or that has happened to you makes it seem risky and even foolish. Sometimes it feel impossible—or at the very least useless—to hold on to faith that God is still working when none of it makes sense. And it takes courage to keep dreaming when the circumstances that surround you make it seem as though your life is more like a nightmare loop than a dream come true.
• “We can’t rely on logic alone. It will always dare us to give up faith just when that is all we have left and exactly what we need most.”
• Unexpected Gains from Unwanted Pain
• When we pour our blood, sweat, and tears into something we'll have a generous reward on the other side of that effort.
• We're promised by seemingly ever motivational message that if we just endure the process and pain along the way, we'll be rewarded on the other side. But what about when that's not the case?
• Even when we don't get the reward we were expecting, sometimes there is an unexpected refining.
• Refine: to remove impurities or unwanted elements or to improve (something) by making small changes, in particular make... more subtle and accurate
• Unexpected Gain 1: Empathy
• "God, break my heart for what breaks yours."
• Connection is the key to contentment, and it's born out of empathy and understanding.
• Unexpected Gain 2: Patience
• Have you ever tried so hard to make something work that you spent more time hustling and striving than you did resting and persevering?
• If we don't take the time to tend to our bodies' and souls' need so that they can be restored, we might find that, in spite of our best efforts, we end up in the same cycle of hustling for results that feel out of reach, only to burn out.
• Pausing or slowing down, what needs tending? What is worn down or wilting? How can you slow down and clear some space to tend to those things? 
• Unexpected Gain 3: Clarity
• Adversity can lead to Clarity
• What adversity or unholy labor have you experienced? What did that feel like, if at all, has it influenced your pursuit of dreams as you move forward? Did it cause you to pivot? To set some things down and take a break? To reevaluate? Did it bring up fear of the future? 
• Adversity can reveal the next right step in our journey.
• Unexpected Gain 4: Discernment
• Life becomes less about impressing people or doing all the things and more about doing the right things---even if some people are unimpressed or don't get it.
• Hardship has a way of shifting your focus from the unimportant and urgent to the ultimately important and eternal things.
• Unexpected Gain 5: Intentionally
• "As hard as the path there has been, I'm thankful for how it has shaped me."
• No pain, No Gain
• Terrible experiences may not be as pointless as they seem.
• Learn how to own my ambition without allowing my ambition to own me.
• True Success---isn't always getting the outcome we labored and hoped for but instead is gaining the strength and refinement that come through disappointment as well as intense pain and suffering.
• Unexpected gains can be born out of unwanted pain.
•